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22nd April 2017, 09:31 | #1 |
Moderator/Club Shop
MG ZT 1.8t+. No.3 of 4 in Sunspot Yellow & Ford Fiesta in Black. Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Rattler Farm
Posts: 22,565
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Just passing through......
1. If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented?
2. If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes? 3. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery? 4. If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled? 5. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? 6. Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? 7. When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say? 8. Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person who drives a racing car not called a racist? 9. Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites? 10. Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things? 11. Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one? (I like this one alot!) 12. 'I am' is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that 'I do' is the longest sentence? 13. If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed? 14. I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered if Chinese mothers use toothpicks? 15. Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do, write to them? Why don't they just put their pictures on the postage stamps so the postmen can look for them while they deliver the post? 16. You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive. 17. No one ever says, 'It's only a game' when their team is winning. 18. Ever wonder about those people who spend two pound a piece on those little bottles of Evian water? Try spelling Evian backwards: 19. Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming pool? 20. If 4 out of 5 people suffer from diarrhoea, does that mean that one enjoys it? 21. Why if you send something by road it is called a shipment, but when you send it by sea it is called cargo?..
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233,431. That’s our second meet done, no.3 next weekend. onen hag oll |
23rd April 2017, 07:31 | #2 |
This is my second home
MG ZT 180 Auto / Rover 75 2.0 Diesel Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Brecon.
Posts: 7,465
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Some very interesting facts there Bob .
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"You're Not Laughing Now Are You?" Steve |
26th April 2017, 08:28 | #3 |
Loves to post
MG ZT190+ 2.5 2002 Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Dublin
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Had a thought or two the other day - dangerous
would one rodent squealing on another be a rat? Aren't all female dogs bitches? would birds in love be all a flutter? Do lying spiders spin webs of deceit? Do tech savvy budgies tweet? Do the dogs in the street know everything? Can horses nag? If ants had pants what would be in them? Do Chemists dispense with accuracy? If the opposite of Pro is Con then what's the opposite of Progress? |
26th April 2017, 08:34 | #4 |
This is my second home
Volvo C70 Convertible and JZR 3 wheeler Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Tring, Herts
Posts: 3,960
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If 'grass' is pronounced 'grarce', what's a three letter word for a donkey?
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Only my opinion, obviously, so please don’t shoot me if it doesn’t match yours! |
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