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Old 29th May 2022, 13:57   #1
FLYING BANANA
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MG ZT 1.8t+. No.3 of 4 in Sunspot Yellow & Ford Fiesta in Black.

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Cool You gotta love the Irish

Bloke at a horse race whispers to Paddy next to him.
"Do you want the winner of the next race?"
Paddy replies. "No tanks, oi've only got a small yard."

***

Paddy and Mick found 3 hand grenades and decided to take them to the police station.
Mick. "What if one explodes before we get there?"
Paddy. "We'll lie and say we only found two!"

***

A coach load of paddies on a mystery tour decided to run a sweepstake to guess where they were going.....
the driver won £52!

***

Paddy finds a sandwich with two wires stickin out of it.
He phones the police and says.
"Bejasus I've just found a sandwich dat looks like a bomb."
The operator asks. "Is it tickin?
Paddy says. "No, oi tink it's beef"

***

Joe says to Paddy. "Close your curtains the next time you're making love to your wife.
The whole street was watching and laughing at you yesterday."
Paddy says. "Well the joke's on them because I wasn't even at home yesterday."

***

Mick walks into Paddy's barn and catches him dancing naked in front of a tractor.
Mick says. "Oi Paddy, what ya doing?"
Paddy says. "Well me and Mary haven't been getting on in the bedroom lately and the therapist recommended I do something sexy to a tractor."

***

The Irish have solved their own fuel problems.
They imported 50 million tonnes of sand from the Arabs and they're going to drill for their own oil...

***

Paddy says to Mick. “I'm ready for a holiday, only this year I'm going to do it a bit different.
3 years ago I went to Spain and Mary got pregnant.
2 years ago I went to Italy and Mary got pregnant.
Last year I went to Majorca and Mary got pregnant."
Mick asks. “So what are you going to do this year?"
Paddy replies. “I'll take her with me!"

***

Paddy says to Mick. "Christmas is on a Friday this year"
Mick says. "Let's hope it's not the 13th."

***

Paddy's in the bathroom and Murphy shouts to him. "Did you find the shampoo?"
Paddy says. "Oi did, but it's for dry hair and I've just wet mine."
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232750. Be patient Banana, we will soon be back together and enjoying the shows again.

onen hag oll
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Old 2nd June 2022, 20:39   #2
Azur
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Thanks for letting me laugh out loud! Importing soil to drill for oil hahaha
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Old 3rd June 2022, 21:12   #3
jackatesme
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rover 75 saloon.Renault Captur 1.5 diesel.

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Brilliant.
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Maralyn was born 9th Sept 2004 14.44.48.
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