Second chance, what would you do?

[trikey]

Originally Posted by Mike Noc

Dave thank you for sharing this with us. When I read it I thought yep sort of thing I'd do too, as I'm sure a lot of us would. Over the years I've often remembered what you wrote when my mum asked me to do something or other.

Sadly she died early this morning, after a good innings at 94, peacefully in her sleep. So thank you again mate, you made me a better son from hearing of your experience.

Sorry to hear this Mike, go steady mate..

[sworks]

So sorry to hear this Mike

[stocktake]

Originally Posted by Mike Noc

Dave thank you for sharing this with us. When I read it I thought yep sort of thing I'd do too, as I'm sure a lot of us would. Over the years I've often remembered what you wrote when my mum asked me to do something or other.

Sadly she died early this morning, after a good innings at 94, peacefully in her sleep. So thank you again mate, you made me a better son from hearing of your experience.

Wow, I can honestly say I have made some wrong decisions in my life the most costly cost me in excess of £100,000 but nothing will ever come close to that decision with my mum. It means so much that sharing it maybe helped you a little
Condolences Mike but also thankyou so much for posting.

[Saga Lout]

We all can look back and what if are two very big words, I would go back to January/February this year. I would pick up my brother from his house and bring him to mine with my log burner lit and glowing hot, his house always felt cold and his liver failure made his blood like water. I can see him lying on the floor in front of the fire getting warm and some sleep for a few hours, I should have taken some pictures for my own selfish reasons but, I believed he would get his transplant and didn't take one.
When we were little he guided me through the growing up years, we climbed trees and explored many places together, he held my hand as only a big brother could. In the following years I grew to be much bigger and stronger than he grew to be, he used my size and strength in our adult years many times, me lifting engines out of cars for him as he looked on, I did his practical stuff like his CCTV and mending broken things as and when, he needed me and I was happy to help.
I'm left with a heartache that can't be mended because he needed me once more and I wasn't there, he got into the bath and didn't have the strength to get out with his illness, he said to his wife that if I was there I'd have him out in seconds but was afraid of the virus, he was in there for two hours and that hurts me so very much.
In his final days when we knew he was dying we didn't let him know, not one little clue, he took his last breath unaware of how ill he was and I was there, the little brother holding his big brothers hand once more as he started his journey into eternity, I held his hand again for the first time in over fifty years in that final week, I couldn't make him well but I wanted to be there like we once were as little boys, Mike and Ant as one once more.
I miss him and always will, this Christmas will be the first and hardest without him, my big brother Anthony.

[JohnnyBG]

Thanks, it's good to know you are not on your own. Mum and Dad were great despite the grief I gave them in my mid to late teens they were always supportive and loving. Dad died on Christmas Day and Mum February following. ironically on my wife's birthday.

Same kind of story as others on the miscarriage front. Lost the first, second one my eldest son, 26 now and a great lad who's a real friend. Then miscarriage after miscarriage, none getting past 8 weeks. Then one stuck, good at 12 weeks and died at 17.

We adopted a 20 month old boy and then three years later the birth mother was pregnant again and we said we'd take our youngsters full sibling. Birth father died during the pregnancy. We formally adopted the sister at 6 months. A year later birth mother died.

They'd have been poorly placed without us but are lovely, now 18 and 22 so sometimes good things can come about from bad things.

Best wishes to you all.

JohnnyBG

[JohnnyBG]

Sorry, on topic, place in history Rover related was the drive to Liewen in the Moselle valley.

Rover 75 CDTI Connie Tourer, the same as I still have only now 100k more miles, 5 up, luggage and 4 bicycles on the back (that Thule stuff worked well). Indicated 110mph on the autobahn just to keep up with the flow.

The place was brilliant, the kids couldn't have enjoyed it more. Loaded up after two weeks to come back, travelled 25 meters and front spring snapped. Long story but the place let us stay for another week for 35 euros while it was fixed! Weather remained fantaaaaaastic.

JohnnyBG

[It runs]

Posts like this show our human side .
If I bear to you my last 7 years then you probably wouldn't sleep properly again .
But if I could go back to a moment then it would be 1976
In the school playground with some friends .
Collecting ladybirds in match boxes.
We let them go by the way as I recall.
Running around the playground playing aeroplanes Germany v England
Ww2 seemed a million years away in history but it was a mere 21 years previous..
But if I could go back then it would be that moment .
I wouldn't change anything .less the last 7 years but there it is

[solarsailor]

My mum died in 1991 and at the time I was living hundreds of miles away in Scotland. When I got back to my home town after a ten hour drive I couldn't face seeing her body and thought (foolishly) that I'd prefer to remember her as she was. I've regretted that decision ever since and would welcome the opportunity to turn the clock back so I could give her a hug and kiss her goodbye.

[Dorset Bob]

I would like to really thank you guys for sharing your experiences, albeit very painful.
For myself, I have found it difficult to share, but here goes…

Due to my father’s work, we moved around a lot and my big sister and I were always the new kids on the block. We became very close and she was a major influence for me.
She was the kindest person you could meet and I can always remember her wise words, her love of decent music (usually played very loud) and her wicked sense of humour.
Christmas memories always have my sister there, she made everything special.

Sadly, she never saw last Christmas as she died on New Year’s Eve.

I don’t wear a suit much these days and I remember taking my best suit out of the wardrobe to pack to go to her funeral in Essex. The last time I wore it was the previous year at my father’s funeral.
When I arrived, my sister gave me a hug and told me how smart I was. Now the next time I going to wear it was at her funeral.
I sat on the bed and cried and cried.

My second chance would be to sit with her at Christmas again.

Instead of pulling her leg I would tell her how much she meant to me.

I know that isn’t possible, but she will remain in my heart and by my side forever.



BTW, I am the one on your left and it is an old photo.