You got to laugh

[FLYING BANANA]

Wow..suitcase packed off on our lovely hols with my amazing husband and wonderful children
( I am shattered from being up all night packing for these lazy so n so’s. I want to drink wine already and its only 4am and we are not even at the airport yet)

Just cooked a lovely tea, can’t wait to snuggle down with my man and eat it!
(hope he chokes on it…and I didn't cook it at all, I warmed it up then put it on a plate so you will all think I am a domestic goddess)

Had the most amazing night with my lovely friends…
( spent most of the night providing shoulder to cry on for recently dumped friend, trying to stop desperate friend who wants a inappropriate man, holding hair for ‘shots all night’ friend while she vomits up £40 worth of booze…..never again.)

Just had a lovely bath complete with candles!!
( had to wash as covered in horse poo and electricity ran out so was forced to use a candle.)

Enjoyed a lovely long walk with the dogs today!
( because they ran off and it took me 5 miles to catch them.)

Had a lovely day with all the family today!
( what was lovely about it was when they went home)

Am off to see a lovely friend of mine I have not seen since school!
( hope she is fatter and looks older than me)

Spent a lovely afternoon making cakes with the kids!
( will now have to spend the rest of the week cleaning cake batter off the ceiling the animals)

Can’t wait to hit the shops with my daughters today! Girlie shopping!
( goodbye salary hello strops and arguments – just kill me now)

Going to have a lovely relaxing early night!
( have to get to bed and asleep pronto, hubby feeling fruity, am not in mood so instigating avoidance tactics!!..