Re-Qualified - Can Now Return To Normal Work

planenut · 3rd November 2018, 07:29

My job role, like that of many others, requires certain qualifications to be acquired, and therefore the magic "Tick" being applied to my record.

Early this year I hurt my back and was off work for a few weeks, and then onto "light duties", and in that period, one of my tick requirements expired, which meant that I could not be employed in the area of my job, but had to help out in a remote office.

Normally, one only requires a two day refresher, but due to the expiration I needed to attend a five day course. Due to me being off and about on holiday and trips I was not able to complete the required course until this week, and it's pretty physical, well, very physical.

The course requires one to do loads of warm ups in the gym, then participate in lots of routines and instruction to prepare oneself for "armegeddon", hopefully never to be encountered. All the instructors and all the other participants of the course are under my age. One young girl remarked that I was old enough to be her dad and I let her calculate why I was actually old enough to be her grandad.

Two people failed the course due to them not being assertive enough. I injured one of the instructors with an arm lock, well he shouldn't have resisted, and I passed the course. All so that I can return to carry out the work I've been doing for the last sixteen years, without ever having to use the freshly updated training.

How many others have had to spend time and endure training and qualifications to carry out your work, never to use it? Loads of you I should think. I suppose that is one of the drawbacks of working for the Home Office.

Nobby · 3rd November 2018, 08:10

Great news Fred, glad your now fit and well. We'll all have to celebrate with a treat of an extra yorkshire pud at the next meet

planenut · 3rd November 2018, 08:53

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nobby

Great news Fred, glad your now fit and well. We'll all have to celebrate with a treat of an extra yorkshire pud at the next meet

Plus extra sausages.

Groundsman Willie · 3rd November 2018, 10:55

Flippin' eck!

Worse thing I have to be rechecked on, is being able to wave a brush cutter around without cutting my own leg off.
I'd ask what you do, but I'm afraid you'd have to kill me if you told me.

Glad you're back fit for duty

Snetty · 3rd November 2018, 13:12

The drivers cpc, every five year cycle 35 hours of 'training' has to be taken in 7 hour blocks. it can be completed in a week taking the same module every day is not against any rules

.
There is no test and failure is unheard of as long as you can look awake for the 7 hours and nod every now and then.
Complete and utter waste of time

75c · 3rd November 2018, 17:25

Quote:

Originally Posted by planenut

I suppose that is one of the drawbacks of working for the Home Office.

My dad works for the home office, I think speed of bacon eating is about as physical as it gets for him. What do you do?

Nobby · 3rd November 2018, 18:34

Quote:

Originally Posted by 75c

My dad works for the home office, I think speed of bacon eating is about as physical as it gets for him. What do you do?

Fred likes bacon too and sausage and more bacon and more sausage and... Give you a clue ......

think Daniel Craig, but slightly aged and weathered. Likes his tea shaken not stirred and drives a mean machine.

Groundsman Willie · 3rd November 2018, 20:00

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nobby

Fred likes bacon too and sausage and more bacon and more sausage and... Give you a clue ......

think Daniel Craig, but slightly aged and weathered. Likes his tea shaken not stirred and drives a mean machine.

He's not Q is he?

"Ah James, gadgets, you say. Well, if you press on this piece of trim......a cupholder. Press on this badge.........a cigarette lighter...........um......well, that's about it I'm afraid.....wait... Press this button and the seat gets warm...no James, no rockets behind the number plate....no, that button really does switch the heater on, it's not a radar jammer."

planenut · 3rd November 2018, 20:22

Quote:

Originally Posted by Groundsman Willie

He's not Q is he?

"Ah James, gadgets, you say. Well, if you press on this piece of trim......a cupholder. Press on this badge.........a cigarette lighter...........um......well, that's about it I'm afraid.....wait... Press this button and the seat gets warm...no James, no rockets behind the number plate....no, that button really does switch the heater on, it's not a radar jammer."

.............and cunningly concealed behind this loose fitting, rattling and wobbling card are the workings of the door.

Groundsman Willie · 3rd November 2018, 20:41

Quote:

Originally Posted by planenut

.............and cunningly concealed behind this loose fitting, rattling and wobbling card are the workings of the door.

Ah, not just mine then

3rd November 2018, 07:29	#1
planenut Regional Secretary Rover 1.8T Tourer Join Date: May 2007 Location: Heathrow Posts: 6,954 Thanks: 1,551 Thanked 2,036 Times in 1,264 Posts	Re-Qualified - Can Now Return To Normal Work My job role, like that of many others, requires certain qualifications to be acquired, and therefore the magic "Tick" being applied to my record. Early this year I hurt my back and was off work for a few weeks, and then onto "light duties", and in that period, one of my tick requirements expired, which meant that I could not be employed in the area of my job, but had to help out in a remote office. Normally, one only requires a two day refresher, but due to the expiration I needed to attend a five day course. Due to me being off and about on holiday and trips I was not able to complete the required course until this week, and it's pretty physical, well, very physical. The course requires one to do loads of warm ups in the gym, then participate in lots of routines and instruction to prepare oneself for "armegeddon", hopefully never to be encountered. All the instructors and all the other participants of the course are under my age. One young girl remarked that I was old enough to be her dad and I let her calculate why I was actually old enough to be her grandad. Two people failed the course due to them not being assertive enough. I injured one of the instructors with an arm lock, well he shouldn't have resisted, and I passed the course. All so that I can return to carry out the work I've been doing for the last sixteen years, without ever having to use the freshly updated training. How many others have had to spend time and endure training and qualifications to carry out your work, never to use it? Loads of you I should think. I suppose that is one of the drawbacks of working for the Home Office.

3rd November 2018, 08:10	#2
Nobby Aged to perfection! Rover 75 Conn SE Tourer Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Princes Risborough Posts: 639 Thanks: 405 Thanked 423 Times in 226 Posts	Great news Fred, glad your now fit and well. We'll all have to celebrate with a treat of an extra yorkshire pud at the next meet __________________ Nobby....... Sometimes I talk to myself, Then we both LAUGH!

3rd November 2018, 10:55	#4
Groundsman Willie Gets stuck in Rover 75 1.8t Join Date: Dec 2017 Location: Newbury Posts: 842 Thanks: 783 Thanked 423 Times in 264 Posts	Flippin' eck! Worse thing I have to be rechecked on, is being able to wave a brush cutter around without cutting my own leg off. I'd ask what you do, but I'm afraid you'd have to kill me if you told me. Glad you're back fit for duty __________________ Dave

3rd November 2018, 13:12	#5
Snetty Posted a thing or two Rover 75 Join Date: Feb 2013 Location: Ingoldisthorpe Posts: 1,114 Thanks: 731 Thanked 415 Times in 274 Posts	The drivers cpc, every five year cycle 35 hours of 'training' has to be taken in 7 hour blocks. it can be completed in a week taking the same module every day is not against any rules. There is no test and failure is unheard of as long as you can look awake for the 7 hours and nod every now and then. Complete and utter waste of time