Please excuse my............

[FLYING BANANA]

These are excuse notes from parents (with their original spelling)
collected by schools from all over:

My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him.
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Please exkuce Pam for being absent from skool. She was sick and I had her shot.
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Dear School:
Please exscuse Cecil being absent on June 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33.
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Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administrating.
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Please excuse Marvin from Physical Education lessons for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip.
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John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.
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Ray was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part
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Bethan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins.
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Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side.
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Please excuse Ray from school. He has very loose vowels.
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Please excuse Pedro from being absent yesterday. He had (diahre) (dyrea) (direathe) the runs.
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Please excuse Burma, she has been sick and under the doctor.
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Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust.
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Please excuse Eddie for being. It was his father's fault.
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I kept Billie home because she had to go Christmas shopping because I don't know what size she wears.
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Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it Monday, we thought it was Sunday.
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Sally won't be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend her funeral.
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My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a weekend with the Marines.
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Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well.
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Please excuse Mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps.
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Mary-ann was absent October 8-11, because she had a fever, sore throat, headache and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever and sore throat, her brother had a low grade fever and ached all over. I wasn't the best either, sore throat and fever.
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There must be something going around, her father even got hot last night.
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Please excuse little Jimmy for not being in school yesterday. His father is gone and I could not get him ready because I was in bed with the doctor!